A Pivot of Gratitude
On Thanksgiving Day before my stomach would grow angry with me, I took a meditative walk down memory lane. Leaving the house, in which I was raised, I ventured on a journey that I frequently traveled as a kid. Within walking distance, my grandparents owned a horse farm and lake house that provided convenient opportunities to ‘run away’ to a safe, private, land in the country.
Sometimes I would stop at the barn and chat with the animals. Buddy and Daisy, the Shetland ponies, were my favorites. Sometimes I would plug in a tennis ball machine and practice my forehand. Other times friends might join me in swimming or ice skating, but often I would sit on the dock, feet hanging just short of the water surface, contemplating life, wondering if a snake might swim by.
My grandparents are now in heaven, but my uncle has expanded the memory opportunities at the property with upgrades and more toys. He doesn’t mind that I squeeze through the locked privacy gate (that’s why I come before dinner) and make sure no one else is trespassing on his land.
Today as I sit on the stone wall at the top on the hill that overlooks the beautiful clear blue green water of the calm lake, I am reflecting on the crazy thought process my mind experienced on the exhilarating walk I just completed.
Because of the increased caloric intake coming with the turkey and dressing, I chose to extend the walk. I strolled past his property extending the calorie burn before returning to memory lane.
The wide flat, lightly traveled, road is fairly new and presents a dream walk for someone who loves to think while walking but doesn’t like distractions, such as holes to avoid, obnoxiously loud vehicles or other people walking, running, or biking, either with traffic or against.
My list of gratitude feels endless. The perfect temperature, the crisp blue skies, and the quietness that allows all senses to find pleasure allows my mind to sit in the joy completely. A campfire smell brings on memories of bonfires and s’mores. A quiet calmness for the ears and crisp vision of a blue cloudless sky for the eyes offer serenity…
When I get to the stop sign, I feel like I could walk for miles but sense that I am running out of time, so I turn around.
Uhoh!
What just happened?
Same day, same weather, same road, same clothes, same mind space, same senses but something has changed…
Someone just turned up the heat… bettter take off my jacket
Someone just turned on the wind and it’s not a refreshing breeze it’s more like a biting wind.
Someone in a loud car just drove by, did they almost hit me?
What happened to the pleasant campfire smell? it is now overpowered by the fragrant smell of progress in the country. Funny I didn’t see that cow farm on my way out. The smell confirms its existence. How do people live in that house?
Where is my Covid mask?
Can’t the world just leave me be?
How much longer? This walk is taking forever!
I wish I had a friend to help me pass the time.
My mind, at a stop sign went from complete gratitude to one of complaining! In an instant, the elements shifted and so did my head…
Luckily the uncomfortable part of the walk did not last longer than necessary but long enough for me to see the struggle of my own mind when it comes to feeling grateful.
We can always find something be grateful for. I believe that to be true. Even Holocaust survivors will affirm that gratitude is a superpower.
But what about our cadence when giving thanks? What if we don’t really feel like it but express it anyway? It still has Holy power.
Looking back, I could have offered thanks for two legs that work, for eyes that see where to walk and ears that hear a car coming and skin that feels warm and cold, to know when to remove the layers. Not everyone has those provisions.
Holocaust survivors could see a reason to show gratitude, even during extreme suffering and distress. Corrie Ten Boom gave thanks for lice! The concentration camp guards kept their distance giving the women an opportunity to communicate freely among themselves. God doesn’t expect us to be perfect. He only asks that we try our best.
For those who are in the hospital, fighting cancer, fighting addiction, or grieving, gratitude may be hard to find. Be kind to yourself first and then try to think of one thing that makes your life better. It’s a start, a way to move forward.
If our heart is grateful, we should share our joy with others. Love the ones we are with.
If we are overflowing with gratitude, we could look for someone in a place of suffering and ask ourselves, how can I bless the ones I love who are in pain?
It doesn’t need to be big; a simple card, text or call may be enough. If God puts something bigger on our heart, we should go for it! It’s a way to exercise the gifts for which we have been blessed.
Let’s start with ourselves, giving us grace, mercy and thanksgiving and move out from there. If we are suffering, we shouldn’t be afraid to let others help. At some point we may be back in a place of giving. We all must participate on both sides of the struggle. That’s how God designed it!
He is so good!
Advent is here!
Stay blessed ya’all!